On my first visit to the obstetrician, she advised me to undergo a transvaginal ultrasound in order to make a conclusive diagnosis of pregnancy. And so I went to the ultrasound clinic (still hoping, by the way, that the test would give me some hope that I wasn't actually pregnant.)
It was an extremely uncomfortable experience. I think it was partly because I didn't know what to expect of the procedure since I haven't gone through it before. The transvaginal ultrasound involves inserting a probe, technically called a transducer, into your vagina so it can sort of visualize your reproductive tract. At the early stages of pregnancy, this type of ultrasonography is more favorable compared to the abdominal one, although the latter is definitely more comfortable. The transvaginal approach allows the probe to be closer to the embryo, so it can yield better images.
The doctor described to me what she was seeing as she was looking around. I heard her say "gestational sac" and "positive sign of pregnancy" and "about 6 weeks pregnant", but what struck me most were the words "subchorionic hemorrhage." I was like, "What? A hemorrhage? Are we going to be okay?" She told me that we should talk more about it in her clinic, and so she let me dress up and I sat on a chair in front of her.
She told me that subchorionic hemorrhage was a fairly common condition, and that most cases disappear by themselves within the 12th week of pregnancy. It happens when a blood clot forms behind where the placenta is supposed to grow. Its presence can weaken the anchorage of the placenta to the uterus, and may cause the placenta to break off, epecially when the clot grows bigger. Its cause isn't really definite, but apparently, stress makes it worse. Because it was associated with a higher risk of miscarriage, for precautionary measures, I had to stay on strict bed rest. Like VERY strict bed rest, as in no toilet privileges.
I think that was the point that my life really turned around. I decided to prioritize the baby over everything else, and all my decisions since then have been for the good of my baby. I took weeks off from school, only showing up for exams. It was then that I realized what precious treasures my friends were to me. They helped me through everything. They sent me notes from school, they visited me when I was lonely, they never made me feel that I was out of the loop just because I couldn't attend school like everybody else.
I also realized how much my then-boyfriend, now-husband loved me. He was my nurse, and he cared for me even after his working hours. Being on strict bed rest isn't an easy feat - for me or for everyone else around. I was constantly frustrated at how I was a burden to everyone in the family. I couldn't do anything by myself, save switching TV channels using a remote. Even for just the simple act of peeing, someone had to get my bedpan and bring it to me. At the same time, I knew I had to swallow my pride and allow other people to help me because it's the baby's life that's at stake.
Fortunately, I was able to survive 6 weeks of total bedrest, with heaps of help from friends and family. But this was only the beginning of the extremely bumpy road that was my pregnancy.
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